God's Way, Not My Way

Remember who you are and whose you are. When you accepted Jesus into your heart, you're identity became that of Christ. In Galatians 1:10 Paul wrote, "Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ." Identity and approval go hand in hand because it is where you seek for approval that your identity will lie. The sinful nature of humans causes us to have a natural inclination to desire approval from other humans. The problem with approval from men is that all humans possess the same sinful nature. As we seek approval from people around us, we often become consumed with meeting their standards and living up to high expectations. Other times, we alter our decisions and lifestyle to avoid disappointing people. Seeking the approval of men not only constrains us to a lifestyle of limited opportunities, but it also affects our identity. Living such a lifestyle causes us to miss what God has for us, because we become so fixed on our desires and upholding the approval of men. We forget that God has a plan already laid out for us with our best interest in mind. Often, it is hard to trust him and follow his plan because we are scared of losing something because of our human nature. We become so lost in satisfying others or meeting human expectations and standards, that we've put God's plan on the back burner because we think our plan is better. Think of a little girl with a small teddy bear, and she's standing in front of God asking her to give it up. She cries because she loves her teddy bear and doesn't want to lose it, but she doesn't see the giant beautiful teddy bear that God is holding behind his back. Whatever happens, we must trust God. Jeremiah 29:11 says "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." God doesn't break his promises. Life may be difficult and confusing, but God's got a reason and plan. Even when the future seems cloudy and unknown, God has an incredible purpose for where you are now, and where you will be in the future. Also, something I've learned is that without pain there would be no healing, without hardship there would be no triumph, and without sin there would be no grace and mercy. Without the flaws of human nature, God's sovereign character would mean nothing. He wouldn't have reason to demonstrate his love. God is by no means in the business of perfection. He is in the business of restoring what's been broken, and we are all broken. He makes beauty out of ashes. Think about New Testament Saul, the man who was well known for persecuting Christians. For a great part of his life, he dedicated himself to killing Christians, then one day, God made himself known to Saul, and brought Saul to his weakest by taking away his eye sight. God then told Saul what he needed to do if he wanted his eyesight back. Saul, completely blind, follows God's instructions, and God restores his eyesight. From that day on, Saul was known as Paul, one of the most influential preachers of the Gospel, one of most, if not the most well known apostles in the Bible, and a walking example of Christ's redeeming love and grace. God took a murderous & hard hearted Saul, and transformed him into a God- fearing servant of the Lord. God is constantly working in you and through you. Trust him, and trust his plan. 

I wrote this post two months ago after I returned from my fourth mission trip in Honduras. I never got around to posting it because I was "waiting on the right time". In all honesty, I forgot I even had it saved in my drafts! But here I am, two months later, and I run across this saved in my notes. I began reading what I had already written, and gradually I remembered the circumstances behind the post. As I was reading those words that I had written two months ago, it became clear to me why I had not posted it yet. God had me run across the draft I had forgotten about for two months on this day for a specific reason. When I originally wrote this post, the purpose I had in mind was for other people to read it and be encouraged. However, those words written above, are not just for other people, but for me as well. God knew that I would need to hear that message at this specific time in my life. I am going to share with you what God has been teaching me, and how he used the very words I wrote two months ago to grab my attention. 

Without disclosing all the details, I want to share what God has been doing in a specific area life for the past several months. It wasn't until yesterday that I saw clearly what God has been preparing me for. Many of my friends and family know that I have never been fond of change. I think that devil uses anxiety cloud my thoughts with worry and irrational fears of losing people, disappointing people, and failure to adjust to change. Once I get comfortable with a certain lifestyle, habit, or person, it is extremely difficult to be open to any type of change. Well in the past two days, the Lord has revealed to me that by holding onto a certain once- desired lifestyle, I have missed a number of opportunities, overlooked other joys of life, and built up walls in relationships simply so I don't disappoint. As I read the draft from two months ago, I heard God telling me to give it up and hand it over to him. I immediately had a peace come over me, and I knew that by giving up that plan I created for myself, there will be so much more room for what God wants for me. After months of battling with my anxiety and fear of disappointing people, yesterday I was finally honest with myself and God. In return, he has relieved me from the stress and burdens that I've been carrying alone for so long. By giving up my plan, things will change, adjustments will be made, but I am able to rest in the fact that God has incredible opportunities in store for me. I can be myself again without feeling compelled to hide behind what I made myself to be for so long. While I am not completely certain of my next step, I am certain that the plan God has for me is beautiful and better than any plan I could create on my own. Like Saul, I am walking into the next phase of life blind with the Lord's guidance. I am hopeful and excited for what's ahead of me, and I am beyond grateful for the joy and peace God has given me in this decision to lay down my plan and give him control. In conclusion, I hope this encouraged someone to reevaluate who they seek approval from, where their identity lies, and whether or not they are trusting God's plan rather than their own. 

Christmas This Year

“so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light. For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.”
‭‭//Colossians‬ ‭1:10-14‬//
___________________________________

"That you may"
This verse says it all- we have been rescued out of the depths of darkness, saved & transformed by the blood of the Lord Jesus Christ, [so that we may] live in a way that reflects Jesus' love and points souls toward salvation.

      Another year, another Christmas, and the choice is ours again- Will we remember the real meaning of Christmas? Every year around this time life seems to get a little bit more stressful whether it's from scrambling to get Christmas shopping done, planning trips to see family, or studying for final exams 12 days before Christmas... (That's me). It seems like the older we get, the more life gets in the way of enjoying family and friends and celebrating our Savior's birth. Satan tries to keep us distracted long enough to over look the things that really matter, and unfortunately, a lot of the time, we let him win.
      Personally, I find myself wishing Christmas could be like it was when I was younger, mostly because life was much simpler then. Now, the Christmas season seems to come and go before I even get a chance to enjoy it. The stress of trying pass finals, buying gifts, and trying to find time to relax and enjoy spending time with friends and family becomes almost overwhelming. But then, factor in the distractions and anxiety that Satan throws at us, and Christmas is pushed to the back of our minds making this season just another one of going through the motions.

     However, I don't want to spend this Christmas mindlessly enduring the stress and forgetting to reflect on the true meaning of Christmas. I want to celebrate the the birth of Jesus, the one who saved me from darkness and gives me life, forgives me over and over again when I sin against him, and the one who continuously picks me up and cleans me up when I fall. Without Him, I would be nothing, have nothing, and this world would be without hope. Christmas should be a time to express gratitude to our Savior for all he blesses us with, to spend time with friends and family, and to share love with others. I realized today that Christmas Day is less than two weeks away, and I up until today I fallen into the same habit of going through the motions. But also today, I took some time to reflect on this past year, and my perspective has been realigned to where it should be. I almost feel like I need to make a list of all the journeys God has taken me on, all the blessings he has given me, and all of the incredible things he has done. Even as I am typing this post, I can feel gratitude and excitement flooding my heart. This time last year I was missing a very close friend and feeling broken for them, a family member was in a very dark place which hurt our entire family's hearts, and I was still praying relentlessly as I worried about someone very close to my heart that was so lost. Friends, let me tell you about how amazing my Jesus is! This year, not only do I get to spend Christmas with both of those friends and that family member, but I am also able to celebrate how Jesus has worked in each of their hearts, healed so much brokenness, and is continuing to do incredible things in each situation! I have so much joy in my heart and I pray that it will overflow into my actions and words over the rest of this Christmas season. My goal this Christmas is that I show my gratitude for Jesus' love and to express my love to my friends and family. I hope you will join me in making this Christmas different, and showing Christ's love to everyone around you!

Life Today as a Follower of Christ

Lately, or should I say over the past several months, I've been learning the truth about humanity and the world. I've gotten older, I've been given more freedom, and I've had to make some decisions own my own, so naturally, I have been more immersed into reality and less confined by the "Christian bubble".  I am extremely grateful for my Christian upbringing, and I know that the Christian school environment, Sunday school gatherings, and sheltered social life has protected from many harmful things in life. But now that I am a teenager, and life really leaves no other choice, I have become exposed to lifestyles and trends outside Christianity. At first, it was scary, and I thought it was all terrible. I was so comfortable and content with my sheltered Christian life. My child- like faith had been so dependent on the rules and morals that my parents instilled in me. But the inevitable, or what I believe to be unavoidable, soon happened. I started to become curious about the way my friends outside of Landmark and Church were living, and then I became fascinated. Before long, I had let down my guard and began to dabble in ways outside of my Christian foundation. That was just the beginning of learning the world for me. Most people know my testimony and that I personally invited Jesus to live in me and guide my heart a couple years ago. I knew when I made that commitment that accepting Jesus doesn't make me excusable or an exception to sin and the evil in the world. It set me apart, but it didn't remove me from the world completely. Since dedicating my life to Christ, I have lived by the verse in the Bible in which God calls us to live in the world but not to be of the world. Also, since making that decision, Satan has tried even harder than before to destroy me. This year especially, I have consciously put myself in situations that are messy, unstable, and potentially dangerous. I recognize that I can't fulfill my purpose as a follower of Christ if I purposely avoid life outside of Church and school. Because of what my mom would call my tendency to gravitate towards messy situations and brokenness- temptation, sin, destruction, and brokenness have been all around me. Though I continue to seek guidance from the Lord and wise council, my feet have slipped from time to time. Sometimes my judgement gets fogged with what the world says is ok and mixes in with what the Bible and my faith says is good. I can't pretend that I always make the right choices or that I am not tempted, and because I want people to see Jesus in me, I believe people also need to see my imperfections. Over the past year or two, I have made wrong choices, I have used poor judgement, I have temporarily forgotten who I was, and I have experienced brokenness within myself, and I recognize the wrong in all of it. I claim my mess and I own it, but I have given it all to God, who forgives and makes me new. It is so hard to live in this world as a seventeen year old, especially as a seventeen year old follower of Christ. Sometimes I feel like the entire world is against me and is trying to make me fall. But again, I proclaim, and I will continue to proclaim, that Christ is victorious in and over EVERYTHING. Even in the most trivial times, the darkest moments, and seemingly hopeless circumstances, the Lord overcomes. I know I have written similar posts to this before, but God's love never seizes to amaze me! There is nothing greater than Christ's affection for us, and his heart for his children. When he sees us slip and fall, he is always the first one there to pick us up. He is our healer, our comforter, our protector, and our giver of life, and without him, we are weak. Apart from Jesus, there is no permanent cure for depression, no sincere joy or peace, no total healing for brokenness, and ultimately no eternal life. God is good, and I am so thankful for his grace. I pray for the people in my life that have yet to grab hold of Christ's promises, and I pray that they may see a glimpse of his goodness through me. I pray for the Christians in this world, that we may not lose sight of truth and hope. His hope is everlasting and unfailing and we can rest in the peace of his promises. 

Jesus As The Standard

Self worth or identity in Christ? Obviously, from a secular view, those are two completely different concepts. However, for those of us who have chosen salvation, self worth and identity in Christ go hand in hand. Self worth can be defined as how you view yourself. Whether it be outward or inward, everyone feels a certain way about themselves. Girls are especially critical of their bodies, personalities, and lifestyle. The world has created an image of "perfect" beauty, shape, and lifestyle, and it has been branded on every young female's mind. Naturally, the young girl who only wants everyone to think she's beautiful or "hot" is going to obsess over striving to meet the world's standards of beauty. They begin to degrade themselves to try to impress and fit the world's definition. A lot of times, girls find themselves in a state of depression because they aren't able to attain the world's approval of appearance and lifestyle. Their expectations have been set too high on the wrong scale and a cycle of low self esteem has begun. However, Christian girls have been given a completely different definition of "perfection". Psalm 139:14 "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." God created each person uniquely in his own image. The God of the universe took time to mold each individual to perfection in his eyes. When God's children are not content with the body he created, it burdens him. Not only were humans created beautifully inside and out in His eyes, but also are given a totally new identity after redemption. God's redeeming love offers a new start to life and also a new mold to define oneself.                      2 Corinthians 5:17 "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come." Beauty is re-defined in the hearts of God's beloved. Instead of seeking beauty of body, shape, and lifestyle-as defined by the world, Christians have been called to define beauty according to God's Word. God desires for his children to be confident in the body he created, and then to strive to live like Jesus. Inward beauty is more valuable, but how could we, dirty sinners, be beautiful on the inside? Well, because Jesus has covered up the dirty with his blood, so now when God looks at us, he sees his son.  The only human that any person should ever compare themselves to is Jesus Christ. Why? Because he lived in flesh and overcame evil. He gave his life for anyone who chooses to accept his gift. Those who chose to receive Christ have his spirit dwelling in them. Basically, we have given up our own identity in flesh to an identity defined by Jesus who dwells in us. Galatians 3:27 "For as many of you were baptized into Christ have put on Christ." So instead of defining your self worth by what the world says, find your worth in Jesus. You will find that to Him you are worth him giving up his own life. Strive to live according to God's truth, and let that be the only standard to which you compare. Women, clothe yourselves in the truth found in Proverbs 31, and men, strengthen your hearts to be the leader you were called to be. Put on the armor of God and practice the fruits of the Spirit, and the image of worldly "perfection" will soon fade. 

Hold Fast

Psalm 139:7-12 "Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you." No child of God will ever be able to flee His presence or escape the bounds of His abundant grace and mercy. In the darkest moments, God still has His light shining. Go back to Psalm 138, and in verse 8 it says, "The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your love O Lord, endures forever- do not abandon the works of your hands." God's children are the works of His hands. He will not ever abandon His children. In Matthew 18, Jesus tells the Parable of the Lost Sheep. In verse 14 Jesus says, "In the same way your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones be lost." Once in God's hands, His child cannot get out of His reach. This is one of God's promises. God's Word and promises give us hope. Sometimes though, we lose sight of that hope, but again God promises in Hebrews 6:19 "We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure." For the Children who are living in God's light and walking the narrow path, it burdens us to see our brothers and sisters stray from the path and step into darkness. However, we must not forget that they will never be too far out of reach for the Lord. We struggle to see a hopeful future, but that's where our faith comes in. Hebrews 11:1 "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Friend, please cling tightly to this promise of hope that our Father has given us. Cling to His love, grace, and mercy. Trust His timing. In Ecclesiastes 3:11 it says, "He has made everything beautiful in its time.." He is working to make something beautiful out of these ashes. Hold on tightly, it's not easy, but it's worth it. Wait on the Lord, trust His faithfulness. Hold fast, God's help is on the way. He never fails. 

Trust

John 6:5 & 6 is one of my favorite verses. "Jesus looked up then, and seeing that a vast multitude was coming toward Him, He said to Philip, Where are we to buy bread, so that all these people may eat? But He said this to prove (test) him, for He well knew what He was about to do." It blows me away. Jesus was testing Philip to see if he trusted in Jesus' power. As the story goes on, Philip starts to panic a little as he tried to come up with a plan. But all along Jesus had the perfect plan. Wait, did you get that? All along, Jesus had the perfect plan! Don't you see, we are like Philip, we only partly trust in the power of God and the Holy Spirit. Because if we did completely trust Him, we would never find ourselves panicking for a plan. God places us in difficult circumstances, trials, or hardships with a purpose in mind, but we fail to see it. Most of the time, when we aren't sure what our next move should be, or don't have a plan, we panic and stress. We tend to look in all the wrong places for an answer that can only be found in Christ. Jesus has everything under control at all times. From the beginning of time, God has known everything that will ever be, and it is all according to His plan. In John 5, Jesus feeds 5,000 people with only a few pieces of bread and a couple fish... He can handle your situation. Trust His power and love and be confident in His plan. It may be unknown to you right now, but trust me, whatever it is, it is perfect. 

Let's Face It.

Here's to the lost, hurting, and broken Christians. Heres to the people I'm burdened for. 

Let's face it. Nobody wants to believe they have problems. No one wants to admit they mess up. No one wants to change. Nobody wants help. Even though they know the consequences of their lifestyle and choices, they can't accept the need for change in order to live a life pleasing to the Lord filled with joy and peace. Somehow they become content with where they are. I mean they say they are Christians, but do their actions back up their claims? I'm not pointing fingers, I'm not near perfect. But I know my faults and I turn to the Lord for help and guidance. I see brokenness, and I am burdened. 

Often times, Christians take Christ's grace for granted. They think that since they've been "saved" that they have been granted a free ticket to live however they please. They get this idea that since they've prayed the prayer, that they can use grace and forgiveness as an excuse to live in constant sin instead of turning from it. It's not like that! You see, God's Word is like an all you need to know guide to Christianity, and spending time reading it is crucial to faith. Read it, and you will see how God feels about sin. They say they've accepted Christ but they push Him aside or place Him in a box and only get Him out when they desperately need something. They forget why they are here. They forget that line "by grace I have been saved". BY GOD'S ABUNDANT GRACE we have been given life on this earth, and while we are, we are given a choice: Life or Death. It's that simple. LIFE- accept God's grace and live  according to His plan and live in a way that brings glory to God. DEATH- believe satan's lies. Live like the world, please yourself. Those are the choices! Only two. Many people have "chosen life" but are not living like they have done so. They've become halfway Christians that live in mediocrity. Such a lifestyle does not please the Lord, so much so that He makes it clear several times in the Bible. (A few: 1 John 3:9, Romans 12:2, in Matthew 18:8 & 9 He commands us to rid ourselves of any sin or wrong doing, and Hebrews 12:13-14, and the one that speaks most clearly about leading a mediocre life is found in Revelation 3:15-16.) God is extremely clear about how Christians are called to live a Holy life completely sold out to Him. And the thing is, God promises so many rewards and blessings for His faithful servants. Not to mention He provides rest, peace, and joy. They are too caught up in the moment. That moment then becomes a way of life. Whether it be sex, drugs, alcohol, partying, and so on. Yes, all these things feel so good in the moment, but it only lasts for a short while, so then they do it again. And again and again until they HAVE to have it or else they will be miserable. But they HAVE to break the cycle if they truly want abundant life with Christ, and who doesn't? It's not impossible to stop and change. It's hard- but the other side is so much better and fulfilling. How are they missing this? I mean yes, I've been there. Fortunately, for me, I didn't dabble in too terrible things. However, I sought refuge, peace, and pleasure in the wrong places, namely, self harm, but that was before I found Jesus. When I found Jesus, I was covered in grace and mercy and love and I was fulfilled so much that I didn't need those things to find an escape or to be happy. So now I have a personal relationship with Jesus, and yes, I have done things that do not honor God. Yeah, I've let my desires over come me a few times. I've crossed lines that I can't uncross. But I've recognized my mistakes and I've been forgiven and I make a continual effort to turn from the things that tempt me. It's a constant battle, but God doesn't expect me to be perfect. He only asks that I rely on Him and repent from these things and try not to make the mistake again. I wish everyone could understand this, because their lives will be so much better. Again, I'm not saying I am perfect. In fact, I'm writing this to myself. I only used the pronoun 'they' because I was originally writing to 'the lost, hurting, and broken Christians'. Really I should go back and change it to 'we', so let's face it, WE all have brokenness.